HEYA!!!

Lol OH OH! *waves her hands around* I'm Skinny!!


Hehe, sorry, I found out I lost another 10 lbs, plus I've started pilates again so I'm feelin' fit. Ookay..should I post long again? God, I talk too much don't I? Well, not too much, but a lot.

Heeere's my frog


Well, according to my silly country's laws, Jack, you'll still be underage to me for another two years hahaha. And by then I'll be..I'll be..*sniffles* 27 >< AAAGH!

Y'know, I hate to say it, but Friendship is a bad foundation for a lasting relationship., but that's one of those things that can't be explained, only experienced. So, I'll leave it at that.

What to cover. Should I talk about masturbation? Unfortunately I can't offer any solutions to that problem. I've always been a sexually crazed person. I masturbate a lot less, but I still do it. Granted I resent the part of me that I have to use, but whatever, I'm used to it. It relieves a lot of tension and I fall asleep a LOT better if I do it right before. But, and this may sound a little funny, if I'm watching something erotic, I always imagine myself in the girl's position and suddenly, I'm not even paying a whole lot attention to what my hand does.

I'm not proud that I masturbate, and I wish I didn't, but there are a million and one things on a daily basis that turn me on and at times, it builds up and eventually it effects my emotions. If I go too long without masturbating, I'll get anxiety attacks and depressed and ugh, it's not a pretty thing.

Ugg..whaat elllssee..sorry my brain has been fried since classes started up again.

Tuna is disgusting btw

OH! Synth, what kind of role playing are you interested in?
I can teach you like game roleplaying..or... roleplaying in bed >.<
I'd much prefer to talk about the game roleplaying, but either is fine.

I know you didn't ask, but I'll put my piece in about my own relationship preferences. I've always pictured myself with a woman, and for along time when i first started on hormones, i considered myself a lesbian, but odly enough things have changed a lot just recently. My father keeps asking me about my sexuality and I tell him I have none, but I AM bound and determined to find a boyfriend when I go to pride fest at the end of the month. Like I said before though, I wish I could find a FTM..lol or a hermaphrodite! XD j/k j/k.

I just think I need a masculine person in my life to balance things out. I do not want to be the masculine one in the relationship. I want someone who can overpower me, or at leasst one who is willing to try. I can pretend like I can't throw him or her around..so long as they're willing to humor me. A guy to stand up for me, a guy to build me a nice deck so I can sit outside and relax..lol even though I'll probably have my laptop with me and I'll be coding something, but still!!!! AGH ok, i better stop before I start going off on my dreams. Wish I wasn't so tall. Oh well, my ass is skinny enough, at least i got that goin' for me for now.

Synth, I used to tune cars as a hobby. A big part of it was the electrical system for sterios and dvd players and game systems. Uhm, yeah, I'm sorry guys, I'm just way distracted.

And by the way, I didn't mean anything negative about children when I spoke about my list of creatures I take care of. I love kids, don't get me wrong, its just sometimes they are like little critters that just..don't...stop.

Y'know, a lot of the time that thing missing is simply a sense of purpose. I feel it a lot when I haven't accomplished anything good in a while. Or when I feel particularly lonely. When I feel like no one wants me, I get that feeling like something is missing and I start to come up with solutions that sometimes are a little drastic. A lot of the time, those feelings get resolved when I find good friends to talk to. When someone actually expresses that they are happy to see me or enjoy talking to me and look forward to doing it again, it relieves a lot of that sense. So, welcome aboard hun, join our little group of friends. Maybe its not the solution, but it will make you feel a little better.

Speaking of which, haven't heard from Ulfar in a while.. *wanders onto DA*

DA? Oh, DeviantArt. Gotcha
I used to use the sister/rival site, Shadowness, back in the V2.0 days... I think it's at V6.0 now, or it was when I checked what... 2 years ago?
I wish I could draw... I'm searching for a decent writers community, although I'm always hesitant to share, since I fell victim to plagiarism a few years back. The piece got an A+ though, so I should be happy, even though someone else got the credit T_T
Speaking of dreams... my "dream life" would consist of:
Financially, owning my own car audio installation/tuning business, and becoming an accomplished author.
In relationships, I REALLY want a wife and two kids. And a little house in suburbia with a white picket fence, you know the deal. Hell, I've already decided upon the name of my firstborn (which will be a girl, so you know!). Perhaps I get lost in dreamland too much.

I love kids too, but my twisted humour gets me in trouble WAY too much... I couldn't stop giggling at the inclusion of children as aquatic creatures.
I've and incredibly dry sense of humour, and love nothing more than watching a good satire. None of this "little britain" bullshit. (Pardon my french)

As for masturbation, roleplaying, relationships etc.
My first and only relationship lasted for about 16 months, although it kind of... died, at about 14 months. That was 3 years ago, and I've succesfully managed to drink my libido into submission during that 3 years, among other things.
Actually, I lie. It's common knowledge that I'm single, and looking. Yet physical contact is such a rarity, that if a woman so much as touches my arm, something stirs in me.
It's been about a year since I last had sex, and about a year and a half since I masturbated. GO TEAM!
As for roleplay, my ex wasn't quite as interested as I was, and she tended to back out, or give up, or something along those lines. I'm a sub, and really get off knowing that I'm pleasuring my partner. But I've never been with a dominant person, so I've had to coax them into it. Perhaps I'm a pseudo-sub. (hmm, interesting theory. I'll have to look into that more).

Well, I KNOW for a fact that I'm a masochist. Oh god, do I love pain. Bites, scratches, cuts, you name it. Except maybe CBT. Not my thing.

Wow, you look GREAT Cadence! Terrible choice of phone though :p (not that I can talk...)

I'm in a strangely upbeat mood today it's a nice change.
A girl at work said I had beautiful eyes. It's a pity she's 15, but hey, someone finds something about me attractive! *dances*

Sorry about my sporadic way of addressing the issues in the previous post... I'm using my phone until I recover my laptop, so I can't really scroll up to see what was said. I'm just going off what I remember reading >.<

Anyways, is it just me, or is this board EXTREMELY slow in regards to user activity?

Dammit, I didn't see your post sorry, Jack!

Hmm, I happen to like tuna on occasion...

Yeah, last time I masturbated, I ended up crying afterwards... self-pleasureFAIL!

And from memory, I was told that English was the hardest language to learn as a secondary dialect. I've only been studying French for about a month.

Yeah, I've been playing sax for years. I LOVE that instrument. Plus, apparently instruments = dexterity, and dexterity = finger skills, and finger skills = girls love you. I've yet to see proof, but that's what I hear, anyway :p

Well, I'm off. My phone's near dead, and I REally Don't want to be charged with murder!

You're making fun of my Samsung Eternity?

I'm making more fun of my Motorola Q700

WHERE THE HELL IS ULFAR? XD

Maybe she actually took up my idea to come to Canada and is flying over right now XD

And now I come back and WHOA, lots of posts XD

Since we are all going about our little dreams, I'm like you Synth... But *laughs* ten times worse... Though for me its not like creepy set in stone, I know I probably won't get any of this... but I can dream.

What I'd like is to move into a mature neighborhood (no 2 inch tall trees for me!!!) and marry someone and have two kids, a boy and a girl.. and then I want to adopt a second boy. And god, if I had my way one of my sons would be gay. I'd be that mom driving him to gay parades, dressed in rainbows XD I am currently set on becoming an english teacher, planning to go to Queens University for the Concurrent Program that lets me come out of uni with both a teaching license and a english degree From there I want to go and teach in Japan for a year or two...

I'd love to write a book or two, I've been told I'm pretty good....

So ya..... that's my ideal life

OH!!! Synth *points to self* I'm a partner pleaser too XD i dunno, for me there's nothing greater than hearing someone moan your name

And Cadence, Miss Cosmopolitan, who BTW looks absolutely stunning ( omfg.... you skinny bitch I envy your body!! XD OH! and I mean bitch in the best way possible )

Your frog is so cool!! D: I want a reptile but I'm not allowed cause it's not cute and fluffy and easy to hold ... LAWL, sooooo when I went out to get a snake my parents got me a hamster WHO is WORST than any old snake. It has seizures when I try and touch it, bites me, tries to kill herself and plays dead so I won't touch it. *glares at Oliver the hamster*

OHHHHHH, and gosh... another sex question, I'm so sorry D: I don't know who else to ask.. cause this is something I CAN NOT ask my mother, who on any other occasion LOVES to talk about sex.

My girlfriend is extremely frustrated cause she can't orgasm, like extremely >.< Cause shes now like turned on 24/7 and has what she calls, the equivalent to blue balls, for girls Is that like normal? D:

I'm tempted to give oral but I don't really know how to go about it .... You don't need to tell me if you feel weirded out, don't worry.... But, a link to a site would help >_<'

*smashes head into wall* I feel like im doing something wrong, cause she just can't hit it......

ANYWAYS,

Tunas okay... but my house has like NO FOOD, cause my mom hasnt bothered to go shopping SSOOOOOOOO i had to eat tuna on stale pieces of bread D: and we had no mayo, so it was just plain tuna. It was sooooo gross

And english is the hardest language cause of our silent letters and Where Wear stuff XD but I dunno, it was on some thing about polish... I'm guessing it must be UP THERE with english?

And LOOLL!!!! Oh my, that does make sense though XD Maybe I should have stayed with saxophone

Rain rain go away... come again another day.

AND, since I STILL can't get my bluetooth to work to send my graphite portrait to this computer... I'm putting a picture of me in January looking... about as girly (and annoyingly slutty) as I get.

And the second is of me and a few friends at a convention, I'm the blonde... I'm dressed up in cosplay, but not wearing my wig, I had just pulled it off ( hence the bad hair) the girl with the cat ears is the "crazy" druggie bi one, the hindu boy is one of our skinny little gay boys (of three, two of which are behind the camera), and then the girl in red is our cool individual one who makes her own clothes.. and the girl with the cool hat is my girlfriend She's even lost weight since then *is proud of her*





Jack.

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Ohh Jack, I'll be back. I can't wait to type this post..haha

OH!!! and commenting on you taking the role of the girl when watching erotic stuff, I'm the same.... but taking the role as the guy. Also when watching yaoi or shounen-ai ... (example my display picture XD) if that was a show, or something I watched... I'd find myself relating so much more to the guy on top than the bottom, sexually, emotionally and.. well any other way you can 'connect' with something fictional


I mean, I think that's why I like yaoi so much, even before I figured out that I was in fact bi, or that I had gender 'issues'... when I would read things with straight couples, I hated to see myself in the girl in the relationship... The weaker sex, feminine, delicate and other things that go along with being a typical woman. I felt like that, because I was a girl, that was the gender I had to relate to. And when I was trying to convince myself I didn't like girls, I felt that pull to feel more attached to male of the relationship, and it almost felt like I was putting myself in the males role, meaning that in the straight relationship.. I was topping a girl. Which at the time, i refused to think of.

So when I found yaoi, it was a guy at the bottom AND the top... So it was like, either one I relate to, the role I am in, is still with a male. And being the 'top' in gay guy relationship doesn't necessarily mean it transfers into " I like to be top, so I must like to top weaker girls, so I must be a lesbian" Which I felt was true in straight relationships.

Discovering my own gender issues helped me reassure myself of my sexuality because I understood WHY I felt so connected to dominating males in straight relationships, and in gay ones.

Don't know if ANY of this makes sense, reading it over it doesn't even make sense to ME.... It sounds right in my head though D:

Random post,

Jack.

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Don't worry, I'll be back. I just have some.. problems with myself.

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Praise to my father
blessed by the water
black night dark sky
the Devil's cry

Oh, okay Ulfar.... I hope you're okay

We are here if you need someone to talk to

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