Humour..

share any homour you read or you have...

here is my 1st post..

Installing Love

Customer Service: Can you install Love?

Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I"m ready to install now. What do I do first?

Service: The first step is to open your Heart. Have you located your Heart?

Customer: Yes, I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

Service: What programs are running?

Customer: Let me see; I have Pasthurt.exe, Lowesteem.exe, Grudge.exe and Resentment.com running right now.

Service: No problem. Love will automatically erase Pasthurt.exe from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. Love will eventually overwrite Lowesteem.exe whit a module of its own, called Highesteem.exe. However, you have to completely turn off Grudge.exe and Resentment.com. Those programs prevent Love from being properly installed.
Can you turn those off?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

Service: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke Forgiveness.exe. Do this as many times as necessary until Grudge.exe and Resentment.com have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, I'm done. Love has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal?

Service: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your Heart. Do you see that message?

Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

Service: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other Hearts to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops! I have an error message already. What should I do?

Service: What does the message say?

Customer: It says "Error 412" Program not run on internal components.�
What does that mean?

Service: Don't worry, that's a common problem. It means that the Love program is set up to run on external Hearts but has not yet been running on your Heart. It is one of those complicated programming things, but in non-technical terms it means that you have to love your own machine before it can love others.

Customer: So what should I do?

Service: Can you find the directory called "Self-acceptance"?

Customer: Yes, I have it.

Service: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

Service: You are welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the "Myheart" directory: Forgiveself.doc, Selfesteem.txt, Realizeworth.txt and Goodness.doc. The system will overwrite conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to delete "Selfcriticize.exe" from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.

Customer: Got it! Wow! My Heart is filling up with really neat files. Smile.mpg is playing on my monitor right now, and it shows that Warmth.com, Peace.exe and Contentment.com are copying themselves all over my Heart!

Service: Then Love is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go.

Customer: Yes?

Service: Love is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody you are meeting. They will in turn share it with other people, and they will return some really neat modules back to you.

Customer: I will. Thank you for your help.

Service: You're very welcome.


Courtesy: Krupa Darshan, Ranjit Mayekar, USA

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lovingsoul...
bad experienced I take it as a good lessons,
good times I saved it as good memories..

love, peace and happiness..

AWW That is such an awesome one! When I think of something Good I'll post, but for now I think the first is going to be hard to compete with... :-p

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Always learning
Always loving
Always living
Without fear
Without regret
Without doubt
I'm just looking for my love
Hoping for a sign from above
So my soul might be complete
And my life ever so sweet

hehehe.. nice rite? I feel good when i read it..

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lovingsoul...
bad experienced I take it as a good lessons,
good times I saved it as good memories..

love, peace and happiness..

That' deep. I'm glad I read this thread. Thanks.

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Watch TG videos at TSseduction.

Subject: genders


You may not know that many nonliving things have a
gender.
For example:

1) Ziploc Bags --
They are Male, because they hold everything in, but
you can see right through them.

2) Copiers --
They are Female, because once turned off, it takes a
while to warm them up again. It's an effective
reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed,
but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.

3) Tire --
Male, because it goes bald and it's often
over-inflated.

4) Hot Air Balloon --
Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to
light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot
air part.

5) Sponges --
Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain
water.

6) Web Page --
Female, because it's always getting hit on.

7) Subway --
Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick
people up.

8) Hourglass --
Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the
bottom.

9) Hammer --
Male, because it hasn't changed much over the last
5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.

10) Remote Control --
Female...... Ha! You thought it'd be male. But
consider this -- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost
without it, and while he doesn't always know the
right buttons to push, he keeps trying.